Disclaimer

This is general information only and not legal advice. I am not a lawyer. For tailored guidance about your situation, consult a licensed Virginia probate or estate attorney.

Detailed answer — your main rights and how to enforce them

1. Right to participate in probate and to be appointed administrator

When someone dies without a will (intestate) in Virginia, the estate typically goes into probate in the circuit court for the county or city where the decedent lived. As the surviving spouse, you are the first person the court will consider for appointment as the personal representative (administrator) of the estate. As administrator you obtain legal authority (letters of administration) to collect assets, pay debts, and distribute property under Virginia law.

If a decedent’s family is trying to exclude you from decisions, you can file a petition in the circuit court asking for appointment as administrator. The court will follow statutory priority for appointment and will consider whether you are qualified and willing to serve. See Virginia’s statutes on probate and administration for details: https://law.lis.virginia.gov/vacode/title64.2/.

2. Statutory share under intestacy

Virginia law sets default rules that determine who inherits when there is no will. The surviving spouse usually receives a substantial portion (and sometimes all) of the estate depending on whether the decedent left surviving children or parents. The exact distribution rules are set out in the Virginia intestacy provisions; you can review the intestate succession provisions at the Virginia Code: https://law.lis.virginia.gov/vacode/title64.2/chapter2/.

Common features you should know:

• If the decedent leaves only a surviving spouse (no surviving descendants or parents), the spouse often inherits the entire estate under intestacy.
• If the decedent leaves a spouse and children (who are also children of the surviving spouse), the spouse may receive the entire estate or a very large share.
• If the decedent has children from another relationship, the spouse’s share is smaller but still protected by statute.

3. Immediate relief: possession of household goods, family allowance, and exemptions

Virginia law also provides short-term protections to a surviving spouse while the estate goes through probate:

• Family allowance or support during administration — courts can allow a reasonable family allowance for the surviving spouse to support living expenses during probate.
• Exempt property and household goods — the surviving spouse is usually entitled to certain exempt items and household goods for continued use.
• Possession of the home — you may obtain temporary court orders to prevent other relatives from excluding you from the marital home while the estate is being administered.

These protections are intended to prevent hardship while the court resolves the estate. See the general probate and administration rules in Title 64.2: https://law.lis.virginia.gov/vacode/title64.2/.

4. What to do if family members are locking you out, controlling accounts, or disposing of property

If the decedent’s family is cutting you out of decisions or taking property, you have immediate options:

1. File a petition in the circuit court to be appointed administrator. Once appointed, you can demand banks and others release estate property to you as administrator.
2. Ask the court for emergency (temporary) orders to preserve assets and stop family members from disposing of property or taking control of accounts.
3. Seek a temporary restraining order if someone is removing property or hiding assets.

The court has authority to protect estate property and to sanction individuals who convert or improperly withhold estate assets.

5. Priority of appointment and competing claims

Virginia law establishes a priority list for who may be appointed as personal representative. As surviving spouse you generally have priority over more remote relatives, but if multiple people petition the court (for example, spouse and adult child), the court will resolve that contest by statutory rules and considering the best administration of the estate. The court may also appoint a neutral professional fiduciary if parties cannot agree.

6. Practical limits and common complications

Even though the law protects your rights, expect some common complications:

• Banks often freeze accounts when someone dies and will not release funds without court orders or appointment papers (letters of administration).
• If property is jointly titled (joint tenancy with right of survivorship), joint owners may receive the property outside probate. Spousal rights depend on how title is held.
• Certain transfers made before death (gifts, trusts, beneficiary designations) pass outside probate and can limit what is available to the spouse under intestacy.

7. How long does this process take?

The timeline varies. Simple estates with an agreeable family can close in a few months. Contested matters, disputes about who should be administrator, or litigation over assets can take a year or more. Seeking a quick appointment and, if necessary, emergency court relief can reduce delay and loss of assets.

8. Where to find the statutes and local court rules

Main Virginia statutory resource (Wills, Trusts, and Fiduciaries): https://law.lis.virginia.gov/vacode/title64.2/

For local probate procedures and filing, contact the circuit court clerk in the county or city where your spouse lived. The Virginia Judicial System’s self-help and probate pages explain filing basics and local contacts: https://www.vacourts.gov/ (use the courts directory to find your circuit court).

Helpful Hints — immediate steps and documentation to gather

• Get multiple certified copies of the death certificate from the funeral home or the health department.
• Collect your marriage certificate and any pre- or post-nuptial agreements, if they exist.
• Make an inventory of known assets: bank accounts, retirement accounts (note beneficiaries), real estate deeds, vehicles, life insurance policies (beneficiaries), and personal property.
• Find recent bills, mortgage statements, credit card accounts, and tax returns.
• Do not abandon the marital home or allow family members to remove or sell property without court permission.
• File a petition for letters of administration in the circuit court where the decedent lived as soon as possible to protect estate assets.
• Ask the court for a family allowance or emergency relief if you need funds for living expenses while probate proceeds.
• Keep written records of any interactions with the decedent’s relatives about estate matters (who did what, when).

When to hire an attorney

Consult an experienced Virginia probate/estate attorney if any of the following apply:

• Relatives are refusing to let you access the home or are removing property.
• There is a fight over who should be administrator.
• Significant assets exist, complex title issues arise (trusts, deeds, joint accounts), or potential debts threaten the estate.
• You need emergency court orders or help enforcing your statutory rights.