Detailed answer — step‑by‑step under North Dakota law

When a person dies without a valid will (intestate) in North Dakota, the probate court in the county where the decedent lived supervises distributing the estate and appointing someone to act for the estate. That court will appoint a personal representative (often called an administrator for intestate estates or a personal representative generally). As the surviving spouse, you usually have the highest priority to be appointed, and you can seek appointment even if other family members are uncooperative.

1. Confirm intestacy and identify the proper court

Intestate means there is no valid will. Probate matters are handled by the North Dakota District Court for the county where the decedent was domiciled at death. The North Dakota Courts website explains probate basics and local filing contacts: https://www.ndcourts.gov/legal-resources/probate.

2. Who has priority to be appointed?

North Dakota follows a statutory order of priority for appointment of a personal representative. A surviving spouse is typically first in line. If the spouse petitions, the court normally appoints the spouse unless there is a good reason not to (for example, the spouse is incapacitated or unsuitable). If someone contests, the court will hold a hearing and decide who is appropriate.

3. Prepare the petition for appointment

To start probate you will file a Petition for Appointment of Personal Representative (or Petition for Administration) in the appropriate District Court. The petition typically asks the court to:

• Find that the decedent died intestate;
• Name you as the person entitled to appointment;
• List heirs and known assets;
• Request issuance of letters authorizing you to act for the estate.

Check the local court clerk’s office or the North Dakota Courts probate forms page for required forms and local filing rules: https://www.ndcourts.gov/legal-resources/probate/forms.

4. Notice and service — you can proceed without family cooperation

After you file, the court requires notice to heirs and other interested parties so they can object if they wish. If family members refuse to cooperate, that does not prevent you from filing. The clerk will instruct how to serve or notify interested persons. If someone actively contests your appointment, the court will schedule a hearing and decide based on the evidence and North Dakota law.

5. Bond, letters, and authority

The court may require a bond (insurance to protect estate creditors and heirs). Some spouses can request bond be waived; this depends on the court and statutory rules. Once appointed, the court issues Letters of Administration or Letters Testamentary (documents proving you have authority to act). With letters you can collect assets, pay bills, sell property if authorized, and distribute assets under North Dakota intestacy rules.

6. Common complications and remedies

• If family will not provide information or refuses to sign forms, you still can obtain court‑ordered powers by filing the petition and asking the court to compel disclosures or to appoint you over objections.
• If someone else files a competing petition, the court resolves priority issues at a hearing.
• If assets are being dissipated or at risk, you can ask for temporary or emergency appointment to protect the estate pending a full hearing.

7. What the court considers

The court evaluates whether the proposed personal representative is suitable, able to perform duties, and whether appointment serves the estate and heirs. The court can reject a nominee for cause (conflict of interest, incapacity, prior misconduct, etc.).

8. Timeline and costs

Timing varies. An uncontested appointment may be handled quickly (weeks) depending on court schedule. Contested matters can take months. Costs include filing fees, possible publication or service fees, bond premium (if required), and attorney fees if you retain counsel. The court can authorize payment of reasonable estate administration expenses from estate funds.

9. If family refuses to cooperate after appointment

Once you hold letters you can legally act for the estate even if family members are uncooperative. If heirs refuse to allow access to property or assets, you may ask the court for orders compelling turnover or holding noncooperative parties in contempt. Maintain records of communications, and follow court procedures for resolving disputes.

Relevant North Dakota resources and statutes

North Dakota’s court system provides probate information and forms: https://www.ndcourts.gov/legal-resources/probate. For the state statutes that govern probate and intestate succession, consult the North Dakota Century Code and the District Court rules available from the North Dakota Legislative Branch: https://www.legis.nd.gov. The specific probate and intestacy rules are located under the North Dakota Century Code chapters addressing probate, personal representatives, and intestate succession (see Title 30.1 and related chapters via the legislative site).

Practical next steps: contact the clerk of district court in the county where your spouse lived, get the necessary filing forms, collect the death certificate and marriage certificate, and prepare a list of assets and potential heirs. If the situation is contested or complicated, consult an attorney experienced in North Dakota probate.

Disclaimer: This information is educational only and is not legal advice. It does not create an attorney‑client relationship. For advice specific to your situation, consult a licensed North Dakota attorney.

Helpful Hints — practical items to gather and actions to take

• Obtain multiple certified copies of the death certificate early.
• Gather proof of marriage (marriage certificate) and any documentation showing you lived with the decedent.
• Make a list of assets: bank and investment accounts, real property deeds, titles for vehicles, life insurance policies, retirement accounts, and digital accounts.
• Collect recent statements and creditor information (mortgage, loans, credit cards).
• Identify and list all potential heirs (names, addresses). The court requires notice to heirs.
• Contact the county District Court clerk where your spouse lived to get the exact petition forms, filing fee amount, and local procedural rules: https://www.ndcourts.gov.
• If assets are time‑sensitive (bank accounts frozen, house at risk), ask the clerk about emergency or temporary appointment procedures.
• Keep a clear log of communications with family members and third parties; this helps if you need the court to intervene.
• If the family is hostile or there are allegations of misconduct, consider consulting a probate attorney promptly. Many attorneys offer initial consultations to explain options and likely costs.