Understanding Your Options in Delaware When a Relative Uses a Deceased Parent’s Bank Account

Disclaimer: This is general information, not legal advice. I am not a lawyer. For advice about your situation, consult a licensed Delaware attorney.

Detailed Answer

If a sibling is withdrawing or using money from a deceased parent’s bank account before any personal representative (administrator or executor) is formally appointed, you generally have several legal and practical paths to challenge that use. Under Delaware law, assets of a decedent’s estate belong to the estate and should be gathered, preserved, and administered by the person appointed to handle the estate. Until appointment, third parties (including heirs or siblings) normally lack authority to spend estate funds for their personal benefit.

Key legal principles and practical points:

Estate assets must be preserved. Funds in the decedent’s account are part of the estate unless they pass automatically to someone else (for example, a surviving joint account holder or a payable-on-death beneficiary). If the account was solely in the deceased parent’s name and there is no survivorship rights or beneficiary designation, those funds are estate assets.
Only an appointed personal representative has formal authority to collect estate assets, pay debts, and distribute property under the probate statutes and processes in Delaware. You can review Delaware’s laws on decedents’ estates here: Title 12, Delaware Code (Decedents’ Estates), and get practical probate information from the state’s Register of Wills: Delaware Register of Wills.
Unauthorized use of estate funds can give rise to civil claims. If a sibling is taking money for mortgage payments or other uses without authority, potential legal claims may include conversion (wrongful interference with property), unjust enrichment, and a demand for an accounting. If a sibling later becomes the personal representative, courts can require an accounting and can hold that person liable for improper pre-appointment withdrawals.
There are emergency remedies. If funds are being dissipated quickly, you can ask the Register of Wills or a court for temporary relief to preserve estate assets. That may include asking the bank to freeze the account or seeking an emergency appointment or limited appointment of a temporary personal representative to take control.

Practical steps to take right away

Follow these steps to protect the estate and preserve your ability to challenge improper use:

Confirm account ownership and beneficiaries. Ask the bank for information about the account title (sole ownership, joint with right of survivorship, or payable-on-death beneficiary). Banks will have different policies about releasing information, but a death certificate and identification often open basic account details.
Preserve evidence. Save bank statements, copies of checks, messages, and any written or electronic communications that show deposits and withdrawals. Note dates, amounts, and reasons given for withdrawals (for example, mortgage payments).
Call the bank. Explain the account owner is deceased and ask whether the bank can freeze the account pending probate or at least flag it so withdrawals are reviewed. The bank may require a copy of the death certificate. Banks sometimes follow creditor/withdrawal rules strictly and will refuse disbursements not authorized by probate documents.
Contact the Register of Wills. Start the probate process in the county where the parent lived. The Register of Wills can explain how to petition to be appointed personal representative and how to request emergency or expedited action if assets are at risk. See: Delaware Register of Wills.
Send a written demand. If appropriate, send a clear written demand to the sibling asking them to stop withdrawing funds and to preserve and account for any money already taken. A written demand creates a record and can be used in court later.
Consider filing for emergency relief. If the account is being emptied, you may need immediate court intervention (a temporary restraining order or emergency appointment) to stop dissipation. An attorney can help file the appropriate petition through probate or the civil courts.

Possible legal claims and outcomes

Depending on facts, remedies can include:

Injunctions or temporary restraining orders to stop further withdrawals.
A court-ordered accounting requiring the person who withdrew funds to document and return improper withdrawals.
Damages for conversion or unjust enrichment if the sibling used funds without legal authority.
Appointment of a different personal representative or removal of a personal representative who later misused estate assets.

Timing and likely process

Probate timelines vary. Filing for appointment can be quick once you have the death certificate and basic information, but contested matters or emergency motions may take longer. Acting promptly—documenting everything, contacting the bank, and starting the probate appointment process—greatly improves your ability to preserve assets and obtain relief.

Helpful Hints

Do not confront physically or threaten the sibling. Keep interactions in writing and document conversations.
Request the bank place a hold or flag on the account and ask what documentation they need (death certificate, probate letters) to freeze or release funds.
If the account was joint with right of survivorship or designates a beneficiary, the funds may pass outside probate. Confirm account type before assuming improper conduct.
Ask the sibling to provide receipts and an accounting for any withdrawals. If they refuse, that refusal supports later legal claims.
Keep copies of everything. Create a dated file with bank statements, correspondence, and notes about phone calls and in-person discussions.
If you want to act quickly but aren’t sure how, schedule a consultation with a Delaware probate or estate attorney. Many attorneys offer short, focused intake calls to explain options and likely costs.
Use official resources. Start with the Delaware Register of Wills for forms and county-specific instructions: https://courts.delaware.gov/registerofwills/.
Be aware of bonds and duties. A court may require a bond from a personal representative and will hold them to fiduciary duties once appointed.

If you decide to take legal action, an attorney experienced in Delaware probate law can evaluate your evidence, advise whether an emergency motion is necessary, and help you petition for appointment or seek recovery of funds. For statutory background about decedent estates and probate in Delaware, see Title 12 of the Delaware Code: https://delcode.delaware.gov/title12/.

Remember: this article provides general information and not legal advice. Speak with a licensed Delaware attorney about your specific facts and options.